Instead, I offer you some other wishes that I don't blab about quite as often. Right on? Right on.
DR SHE BLOGGO's GLEE WISHLIST
I. Kevin McHale sings the Beatles' "Let it Be." I fail to see how this hasn't happened yet, frankly. Kevin auditioned with this song, and from the 15 seconds they gave us, I just want to cry with how damn pretty it is. We've already seen four other audition songs used in the show (Lea's, Amber's, Matt's, and Jayma's) - but not Kevin's. It is some consolation that he's started singing it live at charity events, but I'm greedy. I want a full, HQ, magical, lovely, beautiful Kevin-y version I can play endlessly into my ears. Please?
II. Brad Falchuk and Joss Whedon direct more episodes. Yes, Ryan Murphy got an Emmy for direction, but for my money, Falchuk and Whedon have demonstrated better skills with the show and its characters. Brad directed quite a bit in Season 1, yet has only directed one episode so far in Season 2 - "Audition" - and it was perhaps the best directed of the season. I want him directing again, and soon! And anytime we can get Joss around, I think the show improves by at least 50%. Just so long as he doesn't kill off any beloved characters.
III. Meet the Families! These kids are crazy, screwed-up, loveable, earnest, and damn talented. I want to see where they come from. ALL OF THEM. Not just Kurt, Finn, and Quinn - as much as I do love Burt, Carole, and the serious WASP-y dysfunction of Russell and Judy Fabray. I just want to also see Tina's parents, and Santana's home life, and Artie's mom who survived their car accident, and what kind of family Mercedes has that would let a kicked-out pregnant teenager live in their home. Everybody! Just think of the awesome casting opportunities! Furthermore, it is a CRIME that we haven't met Rachel's gay dads yet. A CRIME. Because any two people who join forces to create a Rachel Berry deserve to be known, in all their glory. Either show them, or make them the most epic offscreen parents of legendary proportions.
IV. Bring back Victor Garber. In an off-shoot of my third wish, I must specify my hope for Will's dad to come back. Remember how he was struggling with being a good father and the masculinity associated with courage? And how he decided to go back to law school well into his 50s? Well, it might be a good time to bring the Original Mr. Schuester back in the picture, considering how much of a sad lost soul his son is right now. Also, we had Victor Garber on Glee and didn't have him sing? Travesty!
V. Girl rap. The boys have gotten quite a bit of rap from the beginning, and yet the girls haven't gone much out of the Pop/Showtune genre (I am decidedly not counting Gwyneth Paltrow's turn at "F*** You"). Granted, there aren't many female rappers out there, but to me that's all the more reason to feature it on the show. Bring out a little Lauryn Hill, or Mary J. Blige, or Queen Latifah, or hey, how about that lady that's been on the show already - Eve! I would die for a little "Doo Wop (That Thing)" or "Just Fine" or "Ladies First." Or hell, have a girl do a men's rap song. I want to be floored by somebody's secret rapping skills - who would it be? Naya? Amber? Dianna? We can only hope.
VI. A viable storyline for Terri. It hurts my heart to see Jessalyn Gilsig's name in the credits every single week and NEVER SEE HER FACE AT ALL. Since Babygate, she has shown up in the most extraneous, repetitive, and underdeveloped ways, and it annoys me. Either use her well, or just cut her loose. You're wasting her talent, and pissing us all off. There's plenty of things you can do with Terri Schuester that don't involve her failed marriage and hysterical pregnancy. Please do them, show - and without villainizing her.
VII. Let's be friends! There are three consistent dynamics on Glee: rival, lover (potential, former, or current), or ignored. This fact is more apparent than ever, since the show's two tentpole friendships used to be Kurt/Mercedes and Brittany/Santana, and they hardly spend any time onscreen together now. Friendship fail! I want them back! And I also want them to shake it up! What happens when Tina and Santana interact? How about Mercedes and Artie? Brittany and Rachel? Quinn and Kurt? Kurt and Puck? Brittany and Finn? Quinn and Artie? Show me interesting duos! Not to mention, I will campaign for the revival of Rachel and Quinn's aborted friendship until the show leaves my television. Glee has missed the boat on some seriously awesome dynamics, and I want them to rectify that. In sum: friendships just need to be represented, and represented well.
VIII. I want the crazy acapella background music back! Like a big dork, that was one of the first things I loved about Glee - the dizzying "bum-bum-bum" choir voices acting as the show's score. (I know, I know; were my eyes open?) Where has it gone? Luckily, after a little research, I discovered you can listen on YouTube. It's genius, and I want it back.
IX. Birthdays. This is arguably the most insignificant of my wishes, but I'm listing it anyways. I seriously want to know all the characters' birthdays. All we know is that Rachel Berry's is December 18th. I want the rest! And a million extra points if their traits match the horoscope descriptions, too. I don't care if there's any actual iota of truth to zodiac signs; I find it endlessly fascinating. /nerdwish
X. Spread the Wealth. Perhaps the broadest, and most important wish of all. I want to love everybody. I want solos for everybody. I want interesting, meaningful relationships for everybody. I want compelling hardships and triumphs for everybody. I care about the Glee club as a whole and also in its individual parts. Don't screw with that. There's plenty of drama, comedy, storyline, and singing to go around. Ensemble should not be this difficult, guys. I know every actor on that show is damn talented. Now show me.
There you have it! Agree, disagree, or whatnot - respectfully! And as always, thanks for reading.